28
Mar
This Side of Paradise
I’ve honestly never seen a quote as relevant to my current situation, or my current pattern of thought, as this one from This Side of Paradise by F. Scott Fitzgerald:
“You’re not sorry to go, of course. With people like us our home is where we are not… No one person in the world is necessary to you or to me.”
I totally get it. Since I’ve moved to Portland I’ve left Oregon at least once a month. At the very least. When you make the choice to travel as much as I do, your actions are pretty transparent, even to yourself. (If anyone else bothers looking at them.) And at some point, you have to ask yourself, not just what your running from, but what you are delusional enough to think you might be running to. I’m so anxious and so antsy to leave, and then every time I get to where I’m going, I’m overwhelmed with this sense of…”Well…here I am.” And then I’m overwhelmed with this ennui and I don’t even know where to go from there, so I just get homesick.
